A series of Unfortunate events: The reptile room by Lemony Snicket.

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Within the pages you now hold in your hands, the three siblings endure a car accident, a terrible odor, a deadly serpent, a long knife, a large brass reading lamp, and the appearance of a person they’d hoped never to see again and I am bound to record these tragic events

With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket

 

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